there and here

our last debrief session is tomorrow night. it's crazy how life has just taken over. and the time i thought i'd have to wade through experiences and emotions will now have to be sought out. it's probably better that way. why would i want to cheat the process?

thus, in anything but unexpected fashion, i'll be procrastinating my india recap until further notice. what i can (finally) post about is the newfound vocation. most of you who follow along will already understand much of the hell that work has been for upwards of two years now. i loved my job for what i knew i was helping to accomplish and not for the environment or process. more recent circumstances brought me to the decision that it was time to leave, with or without a next step planned out.

the afternoon before my final day at habitat, i was offered a job at my church, the place i've come to love from attending full time the past four years and part time six years before that. i already started work this week, and the best part is being within throwing distance of my brother-in-law's office. i already successfully guilt-tripped him into buying me a toffee nut latte. i claim abject desperation. no one detests mornings as i do.

i'm assisting the executive pastor, and even though i've only been there two days this week, i can already feel myself starting to breathe again. i'd almost forgotten what it was like to feel safe... and not just that, but to feel protected. i'm excited about the new and positive ways that i'll grow, as opposed to what has felt like growth of defiance - or an awkwardly navigated test of resilience.

the opportunity makes me utterly thankful, and the future doesn't seem quite as daunting with that piece of the puzzle in place. if i had to make a prediction, i'd say God isn't close to being done weaving the story, though what He's written truly blew me away last week. i'm definitely feeling a little more peace in the journey these days.